My Parents’ Story
Hello, my name is Gary Nichols and I would like to share with you my family’s personal success story. First, I would like to “paint the picture” of what we all were faced with. My parents had owned the same home that was built in 1912 for 48 years. Over the years the home had received normal upkeep and maintenance but was really starting to show its age. In addition, the surrounding area had grown substantially and my parents now found that they were living 40’ from a heavily traveled, noisy 2 lane highway with accidents commonplace (with a car even hitting the house on one occasion). This created a very difficult situation as my parents were faced with a house that needed some major work that they couldn’t do themselves or afford to have done and an undesirable location that couldn’t be changed.
And to complicate matters my parents are in their early 80’s with my father disabled from WWII (and was only receiving a 20% pension from the VA but we’ll get back to that later). Although they had worked hard their entire lives and led a frugal life, they had very little money saved. They choose to work hard, spend little but never took on the difficult issues that could substantially change their financial picture. They thought that if they worked hard and were morally good they would “get by” and their needs would be met. Unfortunately the world changes and their strategy would prove incorrect.
In early 2003 their strategy started to unravel. For the past 10-12 years my father had been content to basically restrict himself to being housebound with my mother’s role as his caregiver. They would go out once or twice a week to go to church or have a meal together but since they lived in the northeast the tough weather often prevented even these few outings. My mother has lived a healthy life and always prided herself on how young she looked and what good shape she was in but since she had a small circle of friends with few outside influences she didn’t see just how much her health and appearance was slipping.
My father’s lack of mobility and mental stimulation was now affecting his outlook and his desire to do anything. He was becoming more depressed with each passing month and basically no longer participated in life. He was now suffering many skeletal problems including the knee injury from WWII and now related problems in his hip and shoulders. It was now obvious that if something wasn’t done soon their life was basically over other than the pain and suffering that would continue to escalate. To my parents credit they listened to my honest but critical observations and agreed that changes needed to be made and that difficult process would be started immediately……
We made an outline of what needed to be changed and attached a timeframe to each. Since I am now the only child and my wife Jeanne and I live in Southern CA we all decided it would be much better if my parents left their home in the northeast to enjoy the better weather and the increased interaction with us. We all recognized that this was not going to be easy but we all committed that we would see this through no matter what needed to be done, whether we liked it or not, or how long it took to complete.
The first step was to go through over 50 years of accumulated stuff. This could stop many people in their tracks as it is quite an imposing task but fortunately we had my wife Jeanne to help oversee and help with this process. Over the next few months my mother diligently went through all their possessions which was particularly difficult because some of these had belonged to my sister who had died at an early age from cancer. Jeanne would fly back occasionally to help sort and help determine what should stay and what should be donated (to others or to the dump) and by late May we were ready for the first of three “yard sales”. During this time we also planned on how we would sell the home and some of the deferred maintenance was done to make this difficult property more attractive and marketable. For a quick look at some of the stuff that needed to be addressed and gone through click here.
In August the property was quickly sold for a higher price than we were told we would be able to get and we all prepared for the September closing and move date. Their car was sold (again for higher than market price) and with their final possessions decided upon everything else was either sold, given away or disposed of. Everything was personally packed and Jeanne and I headed cross country with all their worldly goods in a 25’ Penske truck while my parents flew to Southern CA to stay with Jeanne’s parents until we arrived.
It was now that the challenges would truly begin for all of us. We had decided that my parents would live with Jeanne and I in our home until their home was ready. We had a lot next to our home that my parents would use for their new home. I had done a significant amount of research in manufactured homes (even visiting 3 factories) and we were prepared to have a nice 1500 sq.ft. home erected on a permanent foundation that we all felt would suit their needs. As we began to finalize the process I discovered some significant additional costs and concerns that caused me to stop the process and reevaluate all the choices available to us. This additional time and research proved to be a godsend as we learned through a good friend of a local builder (Silver Ridge Homes) that could build a high quality, custom home for not too much more $ per sq.ft.
After much thought and discussion we decided to go with the custom home building process even though it meant that we would all have to cohabitate for much longer. Since we did not rush this major decision it was December until we all decided that the end result would be much better with the custom home and February 2004 until the builder could even begin the process. We all felt that all the benefits outweighed the short term inconvenience as we could design in many features and create a handicap friendly design roughly 1800 sq.ft. in size that would help my father now and both my parents as they became more physically challenged in time.
Another very significant decision was made in late 2003; my father was no longer going to avoid dealing with the VA. As with many veterans of WWII he experienced and saw much that he didn’t want to remember and these memories still haunted him in his dreams and daily thoughts. His knee was badly injured (which over time impacted his hip and shoulders with osteoarthritis), had major hearing loss and suffered from what is called PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder). The VA had him only rated at 20% disability and for over 50 years paid his disability claim at this level when he was disabled at a much more severe level. Jeanne and I set out on a mission to have this changed to a more appropriate level regardless of the time or difficulty involved.
My father also agreed to see a doctor about his badly injured knee. In the many years following WWII its condition went from bad to worse to deplorable. After his series of examinations the specialist was amazed at what he saw. The knee joint had mutated with the kneecap’s new position being on the side (not the top) of the knee joint. It was agreed that knee replacement surgery needed to be done immediately and after successful 2 ½ hour surgery it was also discovered that there was a piece of broken bone the size of a 2nd kneecap that had been hidden behind the “real” kneecap on the x-rays. This surgery as well as all rehab and medication was completely paid for by Medicare/Medicare supplement and would have also been completely paid for by the VA. My fathers fear and inaction caused him to suffer greatly for many, many years for no good reason.
As Jeanne and I became more familiar with all the steps and nuances that the VA requires we began to realize just how much aid is available from the VA if one is patient, pleasant, persistent and knows where to look and whom to talk to. Over the next few months we were able to help my father receive an electric wheelchair, wheelchair lift and hearing aids for both ears all completely paid for with $0 out of pocket cost. But our ongoing objective of getting my fathers disability rating changed proved to be very tedious, time consuming task indeed. The VA publishes a free handbook that lists the many valuable programs available and it can be viewed at their website at www.va.gov The VA offers much of value but doesn’t spell out what one really needs to do or how to go about these imposing tasks. That’s part of what we can help you with…….
As spring and summer 2004 came and passed my parents new handicap friendly home was becoming a reality. With these passing months it became obvious we made the correct decision to build a custom home. Although the process can be a bit long the end result with all the built in benefits is fabulous. To view the portfolio of construction in progress pictures click here.
In September the date we were all waiting for arrived….My parents home was now complete and it was time for them to move in. It had been almost a year of cohabitating and we were all feeling the stress. Now it was time to move all their possessions out of our garage and into their new home. As anyone knows who has gone through a move, the unpacking, organizing and arranging can be a very time consuming, tedious process. Fortunately we had my wife Jeanne to fill this role. Jeanne is an “optimizer” (combining organizing, decorating and other talents) and seems to have a special gift in the process of setting up a home for utility, efficiency, safety and appearance. She has the gift of being able to see things most of us can’t and the end result is amazing. To see some pictures and examples of the end result of her efforts please click here
My father’s knee was now healed nicely with most of the mobility and range of motion recovered but it became obvious that he also needed hip replacement surgery. All the years of dragging around his bad leg/knee had taken its toll on his hip. So, my father quickly agreed to have this surgery done as well. As with his earlier knee surgery all surgery, rehab and medication was completely paid for by Medicare/Medicare supplement and would have also been completely paid for by the VA. This time my father did not delay or suffer needlessly.
In November 2004 we received the news we had worked so hard and waited so long for. The news of my father’s claim for an increase in his pension from the VA had been was now finalized. The process had taken 13 months from the start of filing the claim and had required many exams, files of paperwork, countless phone calls to a vast array of departments in various locations/states. But the end result was tremendous……..my father’s disability was now assessed at 100% (up from his original 20% level). What this means is roughly a 10x increase in his monthly compensation ($2239 vrs $205 per month) and this increase was retroactive back 13 months to the original date of the claim.
Let me sum up the benefits my parents received over the past 16 months….
And there are still more benefits to come…. Golden Age Services can help guide you (or your parents) in getting more out of life from your real and personal property ………contact us today for your free consultation.
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